I’m still alive

Just wicked busy.

Funny Student Interaction of the Day:

I am grading history comparison charts of my second graders. One of them wrote that the Revolutionary war was about freedom from taxis. Bet you didn’t know that

Funny Student Interaction of the Day

Me: Is 10 + 5 greater than or less than 9 + 5?
Student: Yes?

ADD and Feelings of Inferiority

I had a horrific interaction with my internship supervisor on Thursday. Like seriously horrific. Because this is a public blog and internet sleuthing could probably result in my identity, I won’t post specifics. Suffice it to say it was truly traumatizing, and mostly not my fault. The person in question acted unprofessionally and inappropriately. This person even said at the beginning that my lessons went well, and that I have a great rapport with my students.

Even though I already have a meeting scheduled with the head of the program to mediate, I still am fighting some pretty significant depression over it.

It got me thinking. I take negative comments pretty hard, and I dwell on them. I’ve read that focusing on bad stuff is an ADD trait, but I sometimes struggle in how much of my feelings of inferiority and failure are my ADD and how much of these feelings are just my personality.

And, of course, since I am depressed and feeling sorry for myself, I descend into this spiral. What if it’s not really the ADD at all? What if I just suck at life? What if I am taking the easy way out by blaming all these things on a cognitive disorder?

Do y’all ever feel this way? What do you do?

Scary

My boss just introduced me to someone as the “organized one” I am not sure if this shows that I am an amazing actor or that he is just that disorganized.

Still Alive

I’ve been wicked busy, and then, today, ended up staying home from school because I caught something nasty from the germ-vectors… I mean, students.

I will post very soon about some of the unique challenges of student teaching with ADD, because let me tell you, they exist

Frustration

I have a really hard time dealing with being frustrated with myself. I had, all weekend long, planned today as the day to sit down and do work. Last night, however, a family friend suggested we go swimming and horsebackriding today. Now, I really needed the exercise, and it felt really good, but it ate up practically the entire day. By the time I got home and napped and ate dinner and was able to start on my To Do List, it was 8pm.

I’ve finished almost everything, if not quite to my satisfaction, at least good enough to call it done, but I am still irritated with myself. I need to start saying no to things, even things that are good for me, if I am going to manage my workload.

Sorry for the downer, I’ll try to be funnier tomorrow

Don’t Let the Dyslexic Fill Out Paperwork

On Tuesday, I had to fill out a big stack of forms for my boss, in order to get hired. A bunch of the forms needed that day’s date on them. A bunch of them needed my birthday on them. It was September 1st. My birthday is January 9th. So I was alternating between writing 9/1 and 1/9. I think I had to scribble out a dozen dates for being the wrong month, or day, or year.

Museums and ADD

So the family I am nannying for this summer has a membership to the Children’s Museum. Since the mom works at home, I try to get the kids out as often as possible, so we are at the museum every other week or so. The kids are under 3, so they have no problem doing the same thing over and over.

Every single time I go, I am thankful that my parents were not the kids museum going type when I was little. We went to places like Sturbridge Village and Mystic Seaport, both New England attractions that are historical villages. Most of the attractions are outside, and are way more low key.

I’m an adult now, with way better coping mechanisms, and the children’s museum is an assault on my senses the second I walk in. Bright colors are everywhere, screaming kids, and the smells that go along with hundreds of small screaming children in a small space. Three whole floors of this.

I couldn’t imagine taking a child with ADD here, without careful prep. Even going on off hours, there is so much going on in each exhibit that I think a kid with ADD would be overwhelmed if he or she was the only person in the building.

I think we often fall prey to the common notion that ADD is something that only affects kids in schools, and when I visit sensory rich experiences like this, it reminds me how much of a misconception this is.

This Is Why Everything Takes Forever

I can’t just take a calming relaxing bath.

No, in order to bathe, I must first find candles, and spend an hour making a calming itunes playlist. I seriously am the queen of wasting time.

First Week of Teaching Down

In other news, I still haven’t finished the cleaning that I posted about. What I came home to still on my bed at 12:30 got unceremoniously dumped on the floor at the end of my bed, and is still there, four days later.

This week was Teacher Orientation, also known as Torture Those with ADD. 6 hours of professional development each day, with a measly 30 min lunch break. That’s right, from 8-12 and 12:30-2 I had to sit still in a seat and listen to someone talk about how to teaching writing. First lesson. Not by making the kids sit for ridiculous amounts of time.

I also got to meet some of the parents, and some of the kids. Lordy, will this be interesting. Expect funny stories. Lots of them. Also, hair pulling. Most likely mine.

I am trying to focus on the little things, and create habits to fit my new space. I was really proud of myself for getting up at 6ish each morning, taking a packed lunch, and being dressed appropriately, complete with jewelry. Goals for next week include packing the lunch the night before EVERY time, and making my own coffee instead of buying it at Dunks.